Before Rule: Name Before Tame. Don't Fire Your Inner Critic. Hire It.
A Name With No Horse: Name it - Claim it - Tame it.
I thought it was my voice. It was my jockey.
“On The First Part Of My Journey” For years, I believed that ‘little voice’ was just me.
Not someone else’s voice.
Me. Mine.
It felt like fate.
No. It felt like fact.
The Plan Was Mine. The Vote Was His: The voice in my head spoke only when I failed. When ‘it’ said, “You’re going to screw this up,” I took that as fact, not commentary.
So I did not question ‘it.’
<<Rattaboy: “Hey! Why bother writing this? Who is going to read this?”>>
Sometimes I thought I did something great, a real ‘Thattaboy’ event.
Thattaboy - Never: Nope.
Criticism... Yep. Praise... No.
It never showed up for the “Thattaboy“ moments. It didn’t provide a victory lap for the wins; it only provided criticisms for the stumbles.
I asked why.
<<Rattaboy: “Hey! I’ll tell you why, “One ‘oh’ sh*t takes away 99 Thattaboys. That’s why.”>>
The reins weren’t the problem. It was who was controlling them.
‘It’ Was A Jockey On My Back: You go with it. Well, more accurately, ‘it’ was a jockey riding me as their horse.
‘It’ was a jockey I never hired.
One day, I asked…
Who ‘Dat? The break came small, yet significant. At first, a moment of silence broke the constant static, signaling a shift.
Then I realized it was a question from me to… ‘it.’
Then, a single question managed to slip through the static—a clear moment of signal.
Small question. Big answer.
There were now two: one speaking, one listening.
Me speaking.
It was a small seam.
Tiny Crack, Huge Fracture: If that is not me, who is ‘it’? What is ‘its’ name?
Does criticism become destiny if ‘it’ goes unnamed?
Then One Became Two: With that question, everything changed—suddenly, there were two voices in my mind; one speaking, one listening.
‘It’ didn’t disappear.
I realized that the key to taking away the inner critic’s power is to clearly separate its voice from my own.
I asked, “Who is saying this?”
That was ‘it.’
‘It’ wasn’t me, ‘it’ was, umm, just ‘it.’
‘It’ was vague, without anchoring, without meaning.
So, I Gave ‘It’ A Name: If ‘it’ wouldn’t acknowledge my ‘Thattaboy’ moments, I would call it...
Rattaboy.
Giving ‘it’ a name marked a clear shift: the critic became separate, manageable, and no longer defined me.
I gave Rattaboy a name and took away its power, its horse.
‘It’ Was Now A Name With No Horse: ‘It’ did not disappear. ‘It’ was now, simply, Rattaboy.
If You Cannot Name The Rider, You Will Live As The Horse: I always remember the story: “If you can’t spot the sucker at the table in your first half hour, then you are the sucker.”
High Signal, Low Noise: Control begins with separation, not silence. Naming Rattaboy marks me as the signal; the inner critic as noise.
I took away ‘its’ power when I gave ‘it’ a name.
And We Flipped Roles. I Was Now The Jockey On His Back: And then, I realized that ‘it’ wasn’t the jockey. I was.
I... was in charge.
BFF? I realized Rattaboy, and I would always coexist.
So, I asked myself,
What Can Rattaboy Contribute? Well, Rattaboy has great analytical and assessment skills. I wanted to use those for my benefit.
I thought about the adage, “An idle mind is the devil’s playground,” and wondered how to keep Rattaboy busy, so...
Divide And Partner: Rattaboy has skills, some skills that I don’t. He notices. He catches what I’m about to miss. The skills were never the problem. The problem was that he was using them. Now he scouts the trail. He runs beside me. He does not ride me.
I Put Rattaboy On The Payroll: Rattaboy was no longer a dictator, but now a helpful servant. Not shining a light on each of my errors, but showing the best path ahead. Not a Monday Morning Quarterback, but now a game planner. Not barking criticism but purring with constructive appreciation.
<<Rattaboy: “Hey! Since we are now ‘buds,’ I decided you get a nickname too. Remember your best friend, the shortest guy on your basketball team? Remember, you called him ‘Skyscraper?’ I am doing the same... FullMoron. Not two words, one word, said really quickly. Ya’ know that’s what ‘buds’ do, eh, FullMoron?”>>
OK, FullMoron It Is: Our ‘playful’ (yes, playful, sometimes helpful, sometimes even valuable) conversations now often go like this:
Hey, FullMoron, did you forget flowers for your wife? Tomorrow is almost here.
Hey, FullMoron, shouldn’t this be on our calendar? Are you trying to make more work for me?
So now...
Rattaboy still has horsepower, but now I’m holding the reins.
A Name With No Horse: That’s what a name with no horse means.
You keep the signal.
You lose the noise.
You are the jockey.
The horse is the tool.
Friend Or Foe? Here’s the paradox: the inner critic that was once a foe is now a friend. Tame Before Name was simply the bridge for that evolution.
Name Before Tame: What has no name gets mistaken for self. What you name, you separate. What you separate, you govern.
I went from “self-talk” to “Self-talking.”
How? Name it. Claim it. Tame it.
<<Rattaboy: “Hey! FullMoron. Tell the readers about the Before Rules.”>>
The Before Rules are three-word systems for achieving real outcomes by putting the right thing first. Built on the sequence Here | Before | There, they clarify what must come first so progress becomes actionable, repeatable, and real. Examples include: Deposits Before Withdrawals, Through Before To, and Obstacle Before Opportunity. Visit BeforeRules.com to learn more.
Your Thoughts May Vary: The Before Rules welcomes your constructive comments and invites you to share your perspectives and experiences. Together, we can all refine our understanding and application of these concepts.
Disclaimer: Click here for our Disclosures, Disavowals, And Declarations (aka - I told you so):
Sing-Alongs Welcomed: The essay provides a framework for your mind. This video (3:37) gives your body the beat. You give the idea its spark.
Everything you need to know about Firing, then hiring, your inner critic…Video (3:37) Name Before Tame - Blues Style
AI-Generated Music © The Before Rules™
Video (3:58) Name Before Tame - Country Style
Video (2:03) How To Hire Your Inner Critic
p.s. How did the writer of the song “A Horse With No Name” explain the song?
“Suddenly, akin to ‘waking up in a dream,’ centered on being on a horse without knowing the horse’s name.”
Dewey Bunnell, songwriter, America, to website American Songwriter, March 2020 phone interview with “American Songwriter” Paul Zollo, March 2020
Video (3:27) America - "A Horse With No Name"